Relationship Talk With Bukky: Why does a man's love for you reduce after some time?

Does it mean that all the romantic moments would happen at first but never last?

Dear Bukky,

Why is it that some people are sweet at first, they always have time for you, serious at first but change up after you fall in love with them so much?

Does it mean that all the romantic moments would happen at first but never last?____________

Dear reader,

I think you are in a place now where many people have once been and can absolutely relate with.

Falling in love and being in a relationship are two different things. Linked, but definitely different.

Falling in love is easy, random and unpremeditated. Being in a relationship requires a lot more than that. It is a continuous conscious effort that one needs to stay committed to giving, especially when it is uneasy.

And it’ll sometimes be.

Love isn’t always dreamy and rosy and perfumed. It is gritty as well; requires you digging in your feet and fighting to maintain your promise to the best of your ability.

This part often comes later on. The beginning comes with a heady, giddy happiness. And that deceives people into thinking that that’s how it’ll be forever. But sadly it never does.

What everyone needs to realise is that sometimes you won’t feel in love. And married people have attested to this. But feelings no longer matter after the beginning. It is the decision that counts.

In those instances, learning to not nag or throw tantrums is best. And for the partner going through the phase, pushing themselves as much as possible to stay emotionally connected will go a long way.

Romance can and does last forever. But it gets to some point where it is effort that’ll push it through, no longer feelings.