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Staying Safe While Finding Romance Online

In recent news, the disappearances of Celine Ndudim and Afiba Tandoh have reignited pressing concerns about the safety of online interactions, especially when it transitions from digital chats to real-world meetings. These young women reportedly vanished after arranging to meet a friend they had connected with online. As we increasingly inhabit a digital world, where meeting someone online is as common as a morning coffee run, it’s crucial to discuss and understand the nuances of online safety in the context of romantic encounters.

The internet has undeniably revolutionised how we connect, offering myriad platforms for people to find companionship, love, and lasting friendships. However, the anonymity and accessibility that make online dating appealing also have potential risks. Although not entirely waterproof, here are some tips to help you navigate this space safely.

1. Research and Use Reputable Dating Platforms

Start with choosing a reputable dating platform. Well-known sites tend to have robust safety features and are more diligent in removing fake profiles and scammers. Look for platforms that require identity verification and offer privacy settings that allow you to control who can see your profile and contact you.

2. Keep Personal Information Private

In the initial phases of online interaction, keep personal information private. This includes your last name, address, workplace, and any other details that could be used to track you offline. Be wary of sharing too many specifics about your daily routine until you have established trust.

3. Take It Slow

One common tactic used by those with malicious intent is rushing intimacy. They may profess love or a deep connection quickly to lower your defences. It’s important to take time to really get to know the person on the other end of the chat. Healthy relationships, whether online or off, do not rush.

4. Verify Their Identity

In the digital age, verifying someone’s identity can be as simple as a video call. Platforms like Skype, Zoom, or even FaceTime enable you to confirm the identity of the person you’re communicating with. This also helps ensure the person matches the photos on their profile and can alleviate potential fears of catfishing.

5. Meet in Public Places

When the time feels right for a face-to-face meeting, choose a public place like a cafe, a restaurant, or a busy park. These settings offer safety in numbers and provide a neutral ground for getting to know the person without the pressure of a more intimate setting.

6. Inform Friends or Family of Your Plans

Always let someone you trust know where you’re going and who you’re meeting. Provide them with as much information as possible, such as the name and contact information of the person you’re meeting, the time and place of your date, and when you expect to return. It’s also a good idea to send a message or call at a specific time to confirm your safety.

7. Trust Your Instincts


Your instincts are a powerful tool in assessing whether situations feel right or not. If something feels off about the person or the arrangement, trust your gut and postpone or cancel the meeting. Any reasonable person will understand concerns for safety.

8. Use Built-In Safety Features

Many dating apps have built-in safety features, such as reporting suspicious profiles, blocking users, or sending SOS messages. Familiarise yourself with these features before you start using the platform.

9. Stay Sober

Maintaining a clear mind is crucial on a first date. Avoid excessive alcohol or any substances that could impair your ability to make decisions or manage a situation.

10. Have a Safety Plan

Finally, have a safety plan in place. This could involve having a friend call you at a specific time during the date or setting up your own transport rather than depending on someone else. Knowing you have an exit strategy can provide peace of mind.