How to Be a Better Partner (And Not Just in the Ways You Think)
Let’s be real—relationships are like plants. Neglect them, and they’ll wilt faster than you can say, “I’m sorry.” But give them attention, care, and the occasional spritz of humour, and you’ll have a love that blossoms year-round. So, how do you ensure you’re the partner who’s remembered for more than just being able to pick out a decent anniversary gift? Spoiler alert: It’s not just about doing the dishes or remembering birthdays.
1. Speak Their Language (No, Not Just the Love Languages)
We’ve all heard of the five love languages, right? Acts of service, words of affirmation, and so on. But what if I told you that your partner might have their own dialect? Maybe they’re not a “flowers and chocolates” person, but they light up when you send them a random meme in the middle of the day. Or perhaps they appreciate the way you remember their obscure music tastes more than grand gestures. Pay attention to those small, quirky cues—they’re like breadcrumbs leading to a treasure trove of deeper connections.
2. Be a Mirror But Also a Window
This one’s tricky. You want to reflect the love and positivity your partner gives you (hence the mirror), but you also want to be a window into new experiences, perspectives, and growth opportunities. Challenge each other but with kindness. If they’ve been talking about trying yoga for ages, sign up for a class together. If you’ve noticed they’re great at calming you down, tell them! But also, be the person who helps them see the world in a new light—through travel, books, or even just late-night deep dives into conversations you never expected to have.
3. Give Space to Breathe (and Grow)
Being close doesn’t mean being smothered. Sometimes, the best way to show love is to step back and give each other space. Let them miss you a little! Encouraging your partner to pursue their passions—even if it means spending time apart—can actually strengthen your bond. Trust me, nothing beats the glow in someone’s eyes when they return to share something they’ve experienced or achieved on their own. Plus, it gives you both more to talk about than just what’s for dinner.
4. Be Curious, Not Critical
Ever been in one of those moments where your partner does something that just… doesn’t make sense to you? Instead of immediately pointing out how it could have been done better (ahem, which we’re all guilty of), ask them about it. Be curious about their thought process. You might learn something new about them—or even yourself. Curiosity in relationships isn’t just about keeping things fresh; it’s about deepening your understanding of each other. And who doesn’t want a partner who’s interested in understanding them more?
5. Laugh at the Small Stuff (Even When It’s Not Funny)
Life’s tough. But one of the best parts of being in a relationship is having someone to laugh through the ridiculousness with. Whether it’s an inside joke, a silly dance in the kitchen, or a shared look when something awkward happens, don’t underestimate the power of humour. Laughter is the glue that can hold things together when life seems intent on pulling them apart. And let’s be honest—sometimes, the only thing you can do in the face of life’s challenges is to laugh.
6. Show Up When It Counts (Even When It’s Inconvenient)
It’s easy to be a great partner when everything is going well. But what about when your partner needs you, and it’s not exactly convenient? Maybe you’re tired, or you had other plans, or maybe you just don’t want to deal with another one of their family dramas. Here’s the thing: showing up in those moments, even when it’s hard, is what separates a good partner from a great one. It’s not about being perfect or always knowing the right thing to say—it’s about being there, being present, and being willing to navigate life’s messiness together.
7. Remember, It’s Not All About You
This might sound obvious, but relationships are a two-way street. It’s easy to get caught up in your own needs and forget that your partner has theirs too. Sometimes, being a better partner means swallowing your pride, compromising, or just simply listening. And yes, that might mean watching a show you’re not interested in because it makes them happy, or trying out their favorite hobby, even if you’re not into it. Relationships aren’t about tallying who does what—they’re about sharing the ride, bumps and all.
8. Celebrate the Ordinary
Finally, don’t wait for the big milestones to celebrate your relationship. Appreciate the little things—the morning coffee you make for each other, the way you share a comfortable silence, or the fact that they know exactly how you take your tea. These everyday moments are the threads that weave a strong, lasting bond.
